He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
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