I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
