Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
