Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
