It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
