Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
im holly from the hills drunk
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
