"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
