I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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