I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
