drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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