my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
