"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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