I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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