I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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