We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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