We're like a lot better than the average bears
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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