Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
