I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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