So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
her vagine was all disorganized.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
