I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
no you cant smoke seaweed
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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