Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Randomize
