i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Randomize
