Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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