You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
