Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Randomize
