And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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