I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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