I feel like abortions should bother me more
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
