He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
