guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
