Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
