Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Randomize