there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
