so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
