So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
the day after is always just damage control
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
