That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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