dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
