Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
