smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
