it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
