ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
