Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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