THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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