I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
