i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
