My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
