Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(817): View more from Texas

So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much

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(917): View more from New York City

i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you

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(860): View more from Connecticut

Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that

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(303): View more from Colorado

She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.

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(386): View more from Florida

And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.

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(989): View more from Michigan

My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.

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(785): View more from Kansas

plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together

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