I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I met the friendliest cop last night
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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