Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
