She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Umm I'm too high to move.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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